Creature Features
Here you will find any monster movies. There are quite a few out there from the sublime(Jaws) to the ridiculous(Mega Piranha). As it is one of my favourite genre of horror's I will dedicate this page to creatures great and small. Any suggestions welcome.
Piranha (1995)
Director: Scott P. Levy
Starring: Mila Kunis, William Katt, Alexandra Paul
Format: The Horror channel
Roger Corman presents...usually means cheap monster flick and Piranha is no different. It is indeed cheap but the difference between this and a lot of other cheapo monster flicks is that this is very enjoyable.
The plot concerns a genetically modified killer Piranha let loose into a river on the way to the ocean. There are two main characters, Local mountain recluse moody guy Paul(Greatest American hero William Katt) and P.I. Maggie (Chick from Baywatch Alexandra Paul) are both responsible for releasing the beasts into the wild and thus are responsible for stopping them. There's a sub plot involving Paul's daughter(played by a very young Mila Kunis) being at a summer camp which is located on the route the killer fish are planning to take, yes it's that predictable.
Even with all the cliche's and cheese this movie really does deserve a chance. The FX are pretty decent, with real FX used(unlike the horrible Mega Piranha). The acting is very good with the two leads giving very credible performances. Some of the one liners are hilarious but all in all this is a very enjoyable movie, shot on a shoestring budget to great affect.
There isn't much gore but what there is quite affective. The movie starts with some gratuitous nudity including some gravity defying breasts that must be seen to be believed.
Rating 6/10 Above average monster flick
Starring: Mila Kunis, William Katt, Alexandra Paul
Format: The Horror channel
Roger Corman presents...usually means cheap monster flick and Piranha is no different. It is indeed cheap but the difference between this and a lot of other cheapo monster flicks is that this is very enjoyable.
The plot concerns a genetically modified killer Piranha let loose into a river on the way to the ocean. There are two main characters, Local mountain recluse moody guy Paul(Greatest American hero William Katt) and P.I. Maggie (Chick from Baywatch Alexandra Paul) are both responsible for releasing the beasts into the wild and thus are responsible for stopping them. There's a sub plot involving Paul's daughter(played by a very young Mila Kunis) being at a summer camp which is located on the route the killer fish are planning to take, yes it's that predictable.
Even with all the cliche's and cheese this movie really does deserve a chance. The FX are pretty decent, with real FX used(unlike the horrible Mega Piranha). The acting is very good with the two leads giving very credible performances. Some of the one liners are hilarious but all in all this is a very enjoyable movie, shot on a shoestring budget to great affect.
There isn't much gore but what there is quite affective. The movie starts with some gratuitous nudity including some gravity defying breasts that must be seen to be believed.
Rating 6/10 Above average monster flick
Mega Piranha (2010)
DIrector: Eric Forsberg
Starring: Tiffany, Paul Logan, Barry Williams
Format: The SyFy channel
Oh dear oh dear! There are moments in my movie watching life that I realise that I have wasted over 90 mins of my precious time that could have been better spent in a dentists chair or cutting the lawn with a scissors. This is definitely one of them.
Mega Piranha is that bad and it doesn't even qualify as 'so bad it's good' it's just complete shite.
The genetically modified Piranha have escaped and are eating everything in their path while growing at a ridiculous rate.
That's it more or less. There's the usual military interference and the token 80's pop star ready to save the day but none of this adds to the entertainment value.
The killer fish themselves are all CGI and bad CGI at that. Even scenes when dead piranha are floating have outrageously lazy FX which would have at least looked better if replaced by some rubber fish. The sad thing is that the producers probably spent most of their money on the FX.
The acting is not very good and there is no one that even stands out as decent even superstar Tiffany is even more wooden than the walking trees from Lord of the Rings.
Rating 1/10 Terrible movie. The one is for the flare gun death which is the only cool moment in the film.
Starring: Tiffany, Paul Logan, Barry Williams
Format: The SyFy channel
Oh dear oh dear! There are moments in my movie watching life that I realise that I have wasted over 90 mins of my precious time that could have been better spent in a dentists chair or cutting the lawn with a scissors. This is definitely one of them.
Mega Piranha is that bad and it doesn't even qualify as 'so bad it's good' it's just complete shite.
The genetically modified Piranha have escaped and are eating everything in their path while growing at a ridiculous rate.
That's it more or less. There's the usual military interference and the token 80's pop star ready to save the day but none of this adds to the entertainment value.
The killer fish themselves are all CGI and bad CGI at that. Even scenes when dead piranha are floating have outrageously lazy FX which would have at least looked better if replaced by some rubber fish. The sad thing is that the producers probably spent most of their money on the FX.
The acting is not very good and there is no one that even stands out as decent even superstar Tiffany is even more wooden than the walking trees from Lord of the Rings.
Rating 1/10 Terrible movie. The one is for the flare gun death which is the only cool moment in the film.
Behemoth 2011
Director: David Hogan
Starring: Ed Quinn, Pascale Hutton, Sindy Busby
Format: SyFy channel
You might have guessed I'm sucker for monster flicks and this one is not too bad at all.
Scientists are tracking some irregular seismic activity in a small American town but all along they know it's a huge Lovecraftian Tentacled monster.
We have the usual cliche's with crazy old man(smoking man from X Files) warning people about the beast's coming, butch mountain man who's ex is an expert in seismic activity and comes back to town and teenage daughter who won't follow the rules.
What we do have is a sheriff who actually listens and agrees to evacuate the town!! Shock Horror!
After that there is a frantic chase to save crazy old man's disobedient daughter and her boyfriend who are camping up the forbidden mountain, which technically is the Behemoth's arse. There is also a bizarre section with the crazy old man and his co worker stuck in a diner that has sunk into the ground. They spend 20 mins trying to find a way out(Look at the ceiling you fuckin idiots) and then another 20 mins trying to get up a ladder to the loft. He gets up and then she falls so he gets back down and then she gets up and wait for it....he falls down. If this doesn't get you screaming at the TV like a hormonal banshee nothing will.
The movie goes along at a decent pace but the biggest problem is that the monster is not given enough screen time. I thought it looked pretty cool when it did reveal itself from the mountain. Kinda like the Kraken in Clash of the Titans but it doesn't do much except wave about a bit.
Rating 5/10 More monster would have rewarded with a higher rating. Decent but a lot of filler.
Starring: Ed Quinn, Pascale Hutton, Sindy Busby
Format: SyFy channel
You might have guessed I'm sucker for monster flicks and this one is not too bad at all.
Scientists are tracking some irregular seismic activity in a small American town but all along they know it's a huge Lovecraftian Tentacled monster.
We have the usual cliche's with crazy old man(smoking man from X Files) warning people about the beast's coming, butch mountain man who's ex is an expert in seismic activity and comes back to town and teenage daughter who won't follow the rules.
What we do have is a sheriff who actually listens and agrees to evacuate the town!! Shock Horror!
After that there is a frantic chase to save crazy old man's disobedient daughter and her boyfriend who are camping up the forbidden mountain, which technically is the Behemoth's arse. There is also a bizarre section with the crazy old man and his co worker stuck in a diner that has sunk into the ground. They spend 20 mins trying to find a way out(Look at the ceiling you fuckin idiots) and then another 20 mins trying to get up a ladder to the loft. He gets up and then she falls so he gets back down and then she gets up and wait for it....he falls down. If this doesn't get you screaming at the TV like a hormonal banshee nothing will.
The movie goes along at a decent pace but the biggest problem is that the monster is not given enough screen time. I thought it looked pretty cool when it did reveal itself from the mountain. Kinda like the Kraken in Clash of the Titans but it doesn't do much except wave about a bit.
Rating 5/10 More monster would have rewarded with a higher rating. Decent but a lot of filler.